Don't be fooled by imitations! Beware Bogus George Carlin message.

I got an e-mail message recently that was alleged to be from George Carlin. At first I believed it, and I could see him, hear him in my imagination saying it. It sounded a little like him when he is raving. But as I got down the list, I got heavier and heavier into the right-wing muck. Gradually it occurred to me that it was not Carlin, but someone using Carlin's popularity to spew a very right-wing, bigoted, selfish and proudly ignorant point of view.

I wrote the guy back and asked if he could verify that it was really Carlin, feeling pretty sure then that it probably wasn't. Then it continued to eat on me. Carlin says some pretty outrageous things. Some do sound very conservative, in an unconventional way. Many things he says are obviously not meant to be taken seriously; he is, after all, a comedian.

For example, when Carlin laments the use of the Harley Davidson brand on trendy theme restaurants, he says, "Harley Davidson used to mean something," and his list of things it stood for includes "raping 13-year-olds," Obviously, he's joking, not really glorifying the rape of 13-year-olds. But even though he slides seamlessly from fairly serious statements to outrageous images meant to shock, stimulate the imagination and provoke a laugh, there is an underlying message in his work. It's hard to sum it up. Like Isadora Duncan said, "If I could put it in words, I wouldn't have to dance it."

And you can't classify him in terms of political doctrine, because he's too much of an individual, too real. But the farther into that list I read, the more it looked like some one using Carlin's name to put out a bunch of angry, narrow-minded right wing crap. So I searched and found Carlin's Web site and was happy to see that the subject was addressed there. Carlin didn't write the e-mail. (see below)

I sent the message from Carlin back to the person I got the e-mail from. He's a nice, simple guy who holds irritatingly right wing views, more out of lazy-mindedness than out of the viciousness that is reflected in the right wing policies. He just hasn't thought it through much, hasn't taken the effort to inform himself much, and just holds to views that are easy and don't intrude on your little world too much. He's a perfect target for a bogus George Carlin e-mail, because he can accept it and use it to further solidify his own preferred dogma.

One more lowdown dirty trick from your friends in the Right Wing. =====================

Below is the

bogus Carlin e-mail

"The Bad American,"
and below that I pasted in some of Carlin's disclaimer from his Web site.

George Carlin Speaks Out...
I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.
I like big cars, big hooters, and big paychecks.
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some midlevel governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you'd better do it in English.
I'm not in touch with my feelings and I like it that way.
I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer.
I want to know, which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money. And why is he always part of the problem and not the solution.
I believe if she has her lips on your willie, it is sex, and it is sex for both of you. This even applies when you are President of the United States.
I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4-7 years of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God or gods, just leave the rest of us out of it. This also applies to sexuality. I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.
I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.
I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions.
I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.
My heroes are John Wayne, the Simpsons, and whoever canceled Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.
I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I am freezing my ass through a long winter?
I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt, I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut up already.
I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them. I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you are breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation of the world for the next four years.
I think if you are in the passing lane, and not passing, your license should be revoked, and you should be forced to ride the bus until you promise to never delay the rest of us again.
I think beef jerky could quite possibly be the perfect food.
I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement.
I think Dr. Seuss was a genius.
I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise. If that makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.
If you too are a BAD American please forward this to everyone you know.

We need our country back!

The following disclaimer is from Carlin's Web site

News Flash:
The following items (including the "Bad American" email) were NOT Written by George Carlin: Read Carlin's response to the crap attributed to him on the internet.

(Ed Note: There is a new bogus Carlin email circulating, which you can see here - it's utterly NOT Carlin's work. ... Here are 3 joke lists that were not written by George Carlin: this includes the "Bad American" email that has been making the rounds. We may repeat ourselves here a little in the name of truth...)

For the rest, check out George Carlin's Web site

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